In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize