My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
