It's just like the Real World with babies
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Randomize
