that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
