it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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