Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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