didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Randomize
