So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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