it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
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idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
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this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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