Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Randomize
