i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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