Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
