I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
