This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize