My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Randomize
