just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
