I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize
