I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I think people are normalizing furries
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
