This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
fuck your aforementioned shoe
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
