Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
All the doctor said was why
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
