oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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