ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
We need to rekindle our bromance
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
