Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
