I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
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