once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
