The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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