So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
