Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize