I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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