Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I FOUND THE LEGS
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
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