If i come over, it means nothing
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
