I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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