I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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