so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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