i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
whose parrot is this?
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
