school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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