I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Randomize
