he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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