Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Randomize
