No stitches, just platelets and will power
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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