Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
