can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
whose ass print is on the piano?
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
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