I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
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