being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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