is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Randomize
