I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
