yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Randomize
