I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
