And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Randomize
