I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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