We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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