All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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